Transformation: Feeling blue this summer

If you’ve only been reading my blog recently, you may have missed the entire part where I wrote about my weight loss journey. The reason I don’t talk about it anymore is because, well, things are not going as well as they used to. I don’t exercise like I used to, I gained a bit of weight this winter while on vacation, and it all just escalated from there. Yes, I love food! And no, I don’t have an eating disorder and I am not obsessed with my weight, it’s just that I am the strongest and best shape of my life (and on a good day, the lightest I’ve been in a while!). But today, I am scared. I don’t want to lose it all, over some sweet desserts or a few too many drinks. I made a promise to myself that I can NOT go backwards. I have updated all my closet with new clothes in smaller sizes. It’s just not happening.

The problem is summer and it’s tempting parties. The problem is that I am tired and overwhelmed. The problem is that I have a 3 year old who is turning into a demon. The problem is that I am dealing with some health issues. The problem is that I love blogging and it’s taking over my time and energy. Notice, how I am really good at excuses and can convince myself of anything. I have to stop.

I have to stop being so negative and so hard on myself and start practicing what I preach! I need to remind myself of where I was and how good I used to feel. I need to be myself again!
So, the following is an open letter that I am writing to myself (as prescribed by my personal trainer- thanks Tina!)

Hey Chants!

What’s up girl? How’s it going? I know your stomach pains are getting worse and Victor is turning into the devil and giving you a hard time, but don’t worry, it will pass. Think of all the amazing things you’ve accomplished in the last few years. You are super strong, you’re managing your shoulder and back pain like a boss, you’re blogging career is exploding and your loving family is there to support you. Sure, you started indulging a little bit more lately, and slacked on your lunch-hour workouts. Big deal, we’re human!

I noticed you’re wearing that blue and white dress today, and I wanted to point something out to you, something that I came across on the internet. Remember this photo? Man, that was a while back. This was taken before you had Victor. I mean, your makeup was on point, but girl… I know you were hurting inside. This was the biggest you have ever been. I know you were dealing with a recent miscarriage and maybe over doing it on the “treats”.

Blue stripe dress before

But look at you now! You have a chin, cheek bones and shoulders! Don’t forget how hard you have worked to get here. Don’t be so hard on yourself, just schedule you’re workouts and start cooking with the veggies that are coming out from the garden. Carve out some “Chantsy” time and take care of yourself. You look amazing!

Blue stripe dress after

XOX Chantsy

PS- You’re dress is too big for you now, give it a new home!

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Transformation: Swap & Commit


I did it. I started the pile. I am committed to swapping out all my old, frumpy clothes, for smaller sizes that fit me and flatter me better now. I just can’t wear clothes that look big on me. I have earned the right to wear fitted clothes and to show off my new curves. I want to feel sexy again.

This past weekend, I ventured off to Tanger Outlets (Kanaka) and scored some major deals on: a new pair of white jeans, a new pair of jean shorts and a jean jacket. I had to get used to picking out smaller sizes for myself… Also, it’s nice not being disappointed in the change room.

“It fits!” She hollered from the fitting room.

It’s really difficult to let go, especially if you love your wardrobe and have taken so much time and effort to build it. Some are key basics, some pieces are from my travels. But really, it’s just clothes. I have to learn to let go of them.

It seems glamorous to have a fashion blog, but I purchase everything that you see on here. And trust me, it gets expensive! I wish I was at the point where people were throwing things at me in exchange for a little product review or a shout out.

I am no charity case, but I am writing this post to announce that I would like to sell my gently used favorites for an exceptional price. I’m talking $5 a piece kinda deals.

Keep an eye out on my Facebook album where I’ll be selling my stuff online. If you’re looking for clothes between sizes14 and 16, or XL, this might be a nice way to get some new pieces in your closet for a fraction of the price!

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Transformation: my frenemy the scale

  

This is me every morning now. 

Don’t get obsessed with your weight, it’s just a number, it doesn’t mean anything. It’s all about how your clothes fit, and how you feel (I call BS on this).

I hate that I have made this an everyday routine, but truth be told… it’s what keeps me in check. Lately it’s also been torture… I keep teetering between 185 and 187 pounds. I need to lose another 10 pounds to reach my goal. The last 10 pounds seems to be impossible. Although I have noticed my body shape looks different, and I am a smaller size now than I was three months ago, not seeing any numbers go down can become discouraging.

It’s almost like I’ve lost my drive, and have found a new comfort zone. It’s the same comfort zone I found at a higher weight. I keep telling myself I need to amp up my workouts and be careful with what I’m eating. I keep treating myself and congratulating myself on my efforts thus far. I deserve a reward right? 

I am terrified of gaining the weight back and feeling like a failure. All that effort and all the sacrifices I made… Can you imagine? It’s quite common for people to gain back their weight, but my ultimate goal is to keep it off, and not necessarily keep losing. That’s a challenge on its own.

I’ve been feeling a little bit down lately, and I feel like I need to get this off my chest. Thank you to my friends who keep encouraging me. 

Are you going through similar a phase in your life? Do you have any questions? Please leave your comments below! Let’s chat!

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