Transformation: Feeling blue this summer

If you’ve only been reading my blog recently, you may have missed the entire part where I wrote about my weight loss journey. The reason I don’t talk about it anymore is because, well, things are not going as well as they used to. I don’t exercise like I used to, I gained a bit of weight this winter while on vacation, and it all just escalated from there. Yes, I love food! And no, I don’t have an eating disorder and I am not obsessed with my weight, it’s just that I am the strongest and best shape of my life (and on a good day, the lightest I’ve been in a while!). But today, I am scared. I don’t want to lose it all, over some sweet desserts or a few too many drinks. I made a promise to myself that I can NOT go backwards. I have updated all my closet with new clothes in smaller sizes. It’s just not happening.

The problem is summer and it’s tempting parties. The problem is that I am tired and overwhelmed. The problem is that I have a 3 year old who is turning into a demon. The problem is that I am dealing with some health issues. The problem is that I love blogging and it’s taking over my time and energy. Notice, how I am really good at excuses and can convince myself of anything. I have to stop.

I have to stop being so negative and so hard on myself and start practicing what I preach! I need to remind myself of where I was and how good I used to feel. I need to be myself again!
So, the following is an open letter that I am writing to myself (as prescribed by my personal trainer- thanks Tina!)

Hey Chants!

What’s up girl? How’s it going? I know your stomach pains are getting worse and Victor is turning into the devil and giving you a hard time, but don’t worry, it will pass. Think of all the amazing things you’ve accomplished in the last few years. You are super strong, you’re managing your shoulder and back pain like a boss, you’re blogging career is exploding and your loving family is there to support you. Sure, you started indulging a little bit more lately, and slacked on your lunch-hour workouts. Big deal, we’re human!

I noticed you’re wearing that blue and white dress today, and I wanted to point something out to you, something that I came across on the internet. Remember this photo? Man, that was a while back. This was taken before you had Victor. I mean, your makeup was on point, but girl… I know you were hurting inside. This was the biggest you have ever been. I know you were dealing with a recent miscarriage and maybe over doing it on the “treats”.

Blue stripe dress before

But look at you now! You have a chin, cheek bones and shoulders! Don’t forget how hard you have worked to get here. Don’t be so hard on yourself, just schedule you’re workouts and start cooking with the veggies that are coming out from the garden. Carve out some “Chantsy” time and take care of yourself. You look amazing!

Blue stripe dress after

XOX Chantsy

PS- You’re dress is too big for you now, give it a new home!

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Transformation: Why vacationing scares me

Well here we are, it’s January 2016, exactly one year since I started my transformation journey. I just came back from a one week all-inclusive vacation in Cancun, and my worst nightmare has finally set in. I have no joke, gained 12 pounds. It all spiralled downhill since the Christmas celebrations in December. How could I have let this happen?

I promised I would be good. No desserts, no fried or breaded foods, light on the drinks. I got this. Nope. I was on a rampage, and could not help myself. I overindulged, over ate and over celebrated every, single, day. Now I am embarrassed, ashamed and I feel defeated. I need to find that motivation again. And fast!

“Tomorrow – I’m gonna have salad”, that’s been my mantra over the last year when I had a bad food day. Don’t get me wrong, I’m not obsessed with food, it’s just that I’ve worked so hard to get where I am and all it took was a lousy glutinous week down south to ruin me! The worst part is the food wasn’t even that great. I mean, not really calorie worthy, ja feel?

I tried to be somewhat active. Went for walks, played beach volleyball, participated in the group Zumba class, floated in the water… but it was not nearly enough movement.

I just feel so bloated, and swollen. I feel like the combination of flying and sun does that to you. Maybe it’s from the plane ride? I am so scared to get weighed it at Weight Watchers… I feel like I need a good week to cleans the bad habits out of my system. You know, like “I’ll have the water and salad, hold the dressing” kinda meals for 7 days, while I quiver and sweat out the excess lard through my pores #Rehabstyle.

I know I can do this! I just need some motivation from you, my readers. I also have a new pair jeans I bought last month, I should use them as a motivational tool. They were the smallest size I’ve ever owned… I hope I can squeeze back into them soon. I won’t even try until I lose a few pounds. It would just be too cruel to do it now.

Other than that, my trip was excellent. Lots of relaxing, unplugging and creating of memories with my family.

Anyway, thanks for listening. Just needed to vent. ?

Strategically placed behind my husband and sucking in the tummy- the only way to take a photo in my bathing suit! Also, in this pic I’m wearing an Addition Elle bra as a bikini top (it’s on sale now!)! It’s so supportive, fun and comfortable.

PS- Please do not take this post as an opportunity to sell me any weight loss regimes, products or services. I am so tired of being bombarded with sales pitches, because I choose to talk about my weight. I got this. Thanks!

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